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-how come they make so much??- rant

Journal Entry: Mon Aug 8, 2016, 12:16 PM

i keep seeing journals and posts about how people are getting pissy over how much a plain dog sells for now when they spend a shit load of time on their own work and they wont even get as much money as they probably deserve
no this isn't based on one person 
the posts like this keep getting angrier and angrier and at this point im a bit tired of how ridiculous they are.

one thing i want to get out from the start is
you're angry about how much recognition one shitty piece of art gets and makes when something you've made that isn't shitty doesn't make nearly as much
and then you start crying over the fact that it's somehow the 'popular' artists fault
you're cursing out these people that have spent years building their fanbase and can now make $50+ on a design they spent ( personally ) an hour tops on??
"how come i cant sell anything for more than $5 but they can make that much off of their shit... fuck them and their overpriced lazy asses am i right"
what the fuck??
like what the actual fuck do you think is gonna happen months- years- or maybe even weeks from now once you get a bit popular or known for something you do.
your prices are going to go up right-
your fanbase is gonna get waaay bigger and then bam your shooting out batches of 12 $30 dollar dogs because people like your designs and you need a way to make income.
and when that time comes, the same bullshit name calling and saltyness you had over an artist who makes or made around that amount of money when you were being salty about it. is gonna disappear 
and in place
comes a train of kids who see your shit and go  
"w ow this fucker makes a lot of cash on their shitty ass sometimes not even finished dogs- wtf why do i only make $1 on something i spend 7 hours on when they make more on something they spent 10 mins on???"
sounds familiar right.

knock it the fuck off come on.

when i joined this website 5 ( almost 6 ) years ago
i was living with my mother, my sister, a hobo she met named tony who we thought of as family- in a 1 room apartment in the middle of the slums,
one street was known for it's gang fights, one was known for shootings, we had a neighbor who i had kicked more than 8 times in the balls who kept getting drunk and trying to break in and the kids in the building across the street would call over the police and fire station so much as some kind of a joke that the police never came when actually needed
she was still blind from one eye and was loosing sight in her other and she couldn't work bc she always managed to miss shit she couldn't help missing and got fired
"who wants a blind person working when they can have some other random person work for them for the same shitty $600 a month right?"
we'd rely on a $120 dollars of food stamps a month ( for the many people who dont know what that is it's a card your given that allows you to buy food and ONLY cold or canned food with it, no hot food or candy or BS that they didn't consider food )
and when she didn't have a job the $200 that'd come in from her father bc he's retired and she's disabled so she receives some of the money he made
i had nothing
absolutely nothing
im tearing up over just thinking about it now but
i remember she would even sell herself if needed just so we had food in our mouths and a roof over our head
i remember coming home from school and finding her in the bath tub crying and scrubbing til you could see scratch marks show up and start bleeding 
and i was young but it hurt so much to know that i couldn't help
at all
because i was "too young"
because who in their right mind would give a 10-11 year old more than a dollar thinking they only wanted to buy candy with it
and then i found DA
i remember we had an old blackberry
it was so old the company kept asking us to swap it for something else bc they weren't going to support it soon haha
and on it i found all these amazing artists and animators on youtube and a site called iscribble
i'd go over my cousins house and sit there for hours watching them and seeing how much they made and how they managed to have so many people like and comment and generally support them and it made me realize there is a possibility i can do that
i didn't know what 'that' was
i didn't know what a tablet was
but i could draw
not good
at all
but i could at least pick up a pencil and do something
i remember seeing a tablet be brought up in i think one of hinauchi's videos where she video taped herself using a mouse bc people thought she had a tablet at that time and i commented asking "what a tablet was?"
someone replied saying it's for you to draw on your pc with
and they took time to fully explain how it worked and how to get one and how much they're worth and basically what digital art was
and i remember thanking them so many times i think i made a whole paragraph of just thank yous and hearts
my friends would let me use their computers to scan and upload stuff to youtube and one even helped me make an account since i didn't know what an email was
they'd let me doodle in MS paint and i guess my mom found out i wanted to make
art on a computer and in the middle of summer she came home with an old ratty small honestly the screen was about the size of both of my hands right now
put together
and i loved it
i'd draw and draw and
for the first year or so i didn't do anything with DA besides watch people from iscribble 
i realized i could take commissions on da and came on
but i didn't understand what points were at first so my first adoptable was free
since i thought that adopting meant that they were getting well
and not bought
till this day
no one has ever claimed her
but it didn't matter bc i realized once i got better people would definitely take those
and so i kept making shitty ms paint doodles and trackpad art

mia in need of owner by aduItswim my oc sourstar my final version by aduItswim
sourstar ref ~ by aduItswim ~:nightmare ref sheet:~ by aduItswim mochi~ by aduItswim
dadg ref sheet~ by aduItswim -~Ink~- by aduItswim
from oldest to newest ( i think )
im crying 5 years ago i was still crying over drawing my ocs as cheebs since i was lazy
you can kinda of still see my style from today in there
like the weird round chibi human shapes for my cheeb faces and the eyes- eyebrows and paws smh
that's how i started out
a lot of people ask me why i dont clean out my gallery bc old art is 'gross'
i joke around and agree but i've never once honestly thought my old art was gross
i look back on it and think of how from from where i started im here
and it makes me a little happy
anyway at that time i didn't have a tablet and had about 10-50 watchers
i didn't start taking commissions until i got to 69
took over a year mind u
i remember my commissions were 5-9 points each
and i'd save up and save up and save up and take so many through notes that eventually
i think 6 months later i sent a check to my address from the account i used to round up and send all the points to a widget 
that i managed to help my mom put $15 down that month for rent
only $15
but she was so proud and i was happy i didn't get that it wasn't that big of a help but i was happy i could at least do something
about a year later i realized people liked my designs a little more than my art and i worked on it
eventually i started taking 300 point commissions where i'd make a batch of three for you based off a theme you'd give me
and the 300-500 would pay for one
and to it would be 300-500 for one of the other designs
so the person could choose which design they wanted from the batch and then buy another if they wished and i'd auction off the ones they didn't want so they didn't have to get stuck with designs they well
didn't want
that's when i started getting recognition 
i was known for making small batches of three designs and a year later i got my tablet
i was no longer living with my mother ( i was with my father against my wishes )
and unfortunately once i started making bigger amounts of money i wasn't with my mother to help
he ended up breaking the computer my mother gave me
so for about i think?? ALMOST a year
i didn't have anything to draw with
as an apology he got me a pc he found from 2008 who's battery didn't work
and that's when i started getting a bit uncomfortable with commissions
everytime i moved my pc would shut off and i lost everything i had opened and i got so tired of remaking the same ratty picture or adopt that i started refunding people a lot
it was a hit or miss
you bought something from me
there's a 50% chance i'd finish and a 50% chance i'd end up refunding you
people would get so upset or pissed over it and while i felt like shit for something i couldn't control 
people started to stop commissioning me bc of the fact i did that
they automatically assumed it was bc i was some privileged asshole who didn't need the money and didn't care and people got mad
i remember bc of the fact my pc would shut off i could never fully keep track of things
and people started using that to their advantage
and demanding refunds i probably already gave them twice..
they never bothered to check if it was sent or if it was there
and MANY
MANY people have claimed that i've never refunded them when
while i understand i wasn't able to fully keep track of things
i made sure that when i had the money to spare
i would refund people in bulk
they'd forget what price they payed and would start upping the price
and since i didnt want drama i just payed them 
there's still one person who i honestly just dont want to fucking deal with today bc of how much of an ass they were to me
who ordered an $8 dollar chibi around when my tablet gave out and my paypal account was hacked ( and i lost $300 for a contest i was holding that i closed about a day prior )
that since they never bothered to check their fucking paypal for someone who sent $8 to them even though they claimed they paid $12 twice
that they like to go around screaming about how i still haven't payed them back and it's been a year 
since my old paypal was hacked i had to make a new one and maybe they didn't see the old paypal name and automatically thought i didn't send them anything and just
rudely went off i lost a lot of watchers since they were waay more popular than i was
meaning the price for things had to go down since there was no one to buy them..
so i went from finally making $30-40 on things back to $5-$10
my 'father'
would constantly steal from it and so would his girlfriend but ya know
i "lived in their house so stop crying about it, at least im doing something to help"
even though i never wanted to live there lol
i went there for vacation
was supposed to stay there for a week
and then he wouldnt let me leave
i couldnt make enough to get a ticket myself so i was fucked
this was before his wife hacked my paypal and took all the money in there
but that was why i was constantly always a lil late to refund or pay things
i'd get accused of spending all my money instead of refunding their payments and i get it
u see me spending $10+ on things when i owe you $8 but i would only do that bc i had enough AT that time to pay you back
but as always i have the worst luck and they either took money from my paypal or connected some dumb service to it that would suck all the money out of it and i'd be left with hardly enough to pay both what i was going to buy and what i was gonna refund sighs
that's when i started getting a lot of watchers back
bc i started designing way more bc the need for money to come in was honestly really fucking high
about a year later ( two years ago today )
i stopped taking customs
because it's all anyone ever wanted
and bc my shitty computer would start blue screening and i kept losing more and more work which usually consisted of customs and bc i lost it i lost motivation and since i couldnt bring myself to do it regardless of how many times i honestly fucking sat back down and tried
it didn't happen
so the era of refunds and taking three-six months to do something began
and i had lost a lot of watchers who were very angry over how long it took me to do things 
that's around the time i had just reached 1000 watchers
my prices wen't back down and the time it took to do things got higher
and i got angrier
i got angry bc people would use me
because people with a house 10 dogs and functional parents
who dont have to worry about putting food on the table
would take a $5-$10 dollar dog i made or bought
and sell it for $30-60 two seconds later
they took something from a kid who owned three outfits
a school uniform
pjs and a sweatshirt and some basketball shorts i wore with everything ( old watchers probably remember the videos and pics i posted whenever something went bad or i did a challenge )
and they'd triple the fucking price of something that i spent days or weeks or even hours trying to finish
only for their privileged ass to turn around and sell it for more
that's when i started getting angry and snippy all the time
that's when i started bitching and losing watchers at how ridiculous i thought people on this site were
i kept thinking i expected people to have more respect and only sell things for more if they had art bc honestly if it didn't why would you make a profit off of something you didn't make
but naah
people who have never had to wash their own clothes before love having money$$money$$money to get more digital dogs
and to get that money instead of making it themselves they make it off other people who actually need it
that's when i started losing watchers bc i kept calling those people out
that's when i started distancing myself and ranting bc i realized a lot of the people i called friends would make me gift them something or get something in a trade
only for them to turn around sell it for about 90x what it originally was without art
i stopped making money
i stopped designing for a while and selling other designs i bought i just dropped
i think i lost 300??? watchers
once i came back my designs wouldn't sell and for a year i had to steadily start climbing back up
i had to realize that people are dicks and will use me
i had to own up to the fact that i was too trusting and that people would walk over me
so i upped the snippy ness by 10x
i honestly took no bullshit from anyone regardless of what it was
if i thought you were lying
if i thought you were being fake 
if i thought you just wanted attention and kept lying about shit like suicide
i had no tolerance for shit and while i kind of feel bad for it i dont regret some of the stuff i've said
bc i have gotten rid of some toxic people that used to dwell on this site
kinda proud that i managed to get rid of the top 3 people on mostly anyone who'd been here for more than 3 years blacklist smh
i started getting more watchers bc of this
i reached 2000 around that time
that was last year 
i could finally do things like make enough money to buy things i actually wanted
i still had to 'help' with the bills and was stolen from frequently but w/e
and i kept buying designs eventually people recognized me from auctions and stuff and i gained a lot more watchers who were curious and went to check out my gallery and liked something about it
i decided to hold a contest last year ( the one i started ranting about earlier with $300 in prizes )
that was when everything slowed down
hacked paypal
lost money i needed to give out prizes and refund people
people accused me of not refunding them and shit honestly kept fucking happening so i couldn't keep a decent amount of cash without needing to do something
i need $300 for prizes
a new tablet
i was back with my mother and we didn't have much so i tried to help with food and clothes and the rent now that i could
we move into a new place and a fire happens
i lose everything
the new tablet i spent $500 on
the laptop i got myself
the $1000 bed i helped get her bc she's getting old and i refused to let her sleep on shit
my own bed
all my clothes
we had what ever we left school with
for two weeks straight i know it sounds gross but i wore the same black shirt and sweatpants i had on the day of the fire bc i had nothing else
thank god i had shoes i stashed in my locker for gym
the stupid red converse i've had for literally a year and three months till today
they got through a lot of shit with me and they look like shit now and i can honestly throw them out bc they're starting to wear down but i cant
it was the only thing i had left lol from when i lost EVERYTHING we worked so hard to get
that's when i needed money the most
that's also when a couple scammers kept coming on and stealing designs and selling them and then exclaiming me along with two other people were money whores who deserved it lol
i was stuck in a hotel room for two months ( until the beginning of feb )
then we were in a shelter
you have to leave at 7 am everyday and come back by 11 pm on the dot even if it's snowing
kind of shelter
and a really good person sent me a tablet bc i didn't have one
i was gifted a laptop about two weeks before
and i started drawing again
bc i needed it
bc i wasn't spending it on needless bullshit i started upping the prices
at first people didn't bite but after a bit of work i think i improved a little
i was happy i could make enough to actually fully and thoroughly help that i started gifting things away and trusting people again and boy
was that a mistake
people started using me again and i honestly gave up
suddenly just slapping a name on a design made it 20x what its worth so people used it to their advantage
i slowly stopped taking customs
and started drawing a little more and doing other things
overtime and the many breaks i kept taking my prices came down again
that is until around the last week of school
we left the shelter a couple weeks prior and started living in a hotel again
i started taking YCH'S and adopts to help pay
and bc i was really tight on money and paypal likes taking a lot off from fees
i had people bitch at me for not cutting them some slack and giving them something for a couple dollars less 
que drama
and the losing some watchers when i called that person rude
and then called them rude some more for lying and being dramatic
but with that drama came more watchers and it honestly made me laugh
bc of that i could sell things for a little more and didn't need to put as much time into it as i used to bc i was used to it ( idc how sketchy and shitty a dog looks anyone who's been to a J.M knows i would spend about 3-6 hours on one shitty design - they used to playfully complain about how long it took )
the time came where my mother received her lawsuit money from an accident that made her lose her other eye
we found a house a month ago
and spent a month moving and fixing up everything and i took a break and bc of that was unable to do a lot of things i needed to
on here
i considered leaving da after finishing what i had to but i couldn't bring myself to do it
i joined this site bc i was dirt poor
because instead of being fed i wanted to help feed everyone
through the years the prices of things have gun up and down and up and down again
i went from taking 5-6 point commissions 4 years ago
to taking $2-5 dollar commissions 3 years ago
making $10-20 two years ago
to $30-60 a year ago
and now i make about $30-$200 on average
the most $300 twice off of just designs
and $40-65 on art
so yea
fuck me for making money on art right
fuck me for making money off some sketchy dog that took me 3 minutes 
fuck me bc your mad you cant pay for something you honestly shouldn't have if you can't pay for
im a huge bitch for taking almost 6 years to improve and grow a fanbase
im a cunt and a money whore for making more than $1 on something 
'when you can only make .50 cents'
it's my fault people like to slap my name on things that "look like it took them 10 minutes" and make it probably 30x the price its worth
screw me for needing to make money for a reason money is needed and not selfish desires
and taking almost 6 years to get where i amright
im a huuge bitch
send me straight to DA hell
am i right kids

Add a Comment:
Arsevere Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for sharing your story :) Some people may never understand the reasons other people do things, but you can be proud of yourself knowing that even despite all that crap, you kept your head up and did something about your situation. You deserve all the good things coming your way ;v;
sbooky Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016
the improvement even shows itself after a year
i sometimes think im not improving but then i see my art from 2015 and im like "what the fuck"
but preach this
mars-MUTTZ Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
pre ach f am
Beepups Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016  Student Digital Artist
I honestly didn't think this journal was going to go in this direction but wow.
Honestly I read all of it and I know other people have said this already but honestly it is inspirational to see just how you got how far you are right now.
Ryyce Featured By Owner Edited Aug 8, 2016
Honestly, I feel kinda bad. I was sorta one of the people to complain, but this changes my whole point of view???
I wasn't thinking about their personal lives and holy shit. I don't normally read rants, but I'm glad I read this one.
I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.
Spiceroll Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this is very inspiring oh my go d
inkbitten Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016
this really inspired me

w ow
awoou Featured By Owner Edited Aug 8, 2016
Well it is somewhat true that people tend to buy generic designs solely because it was a popular artist that drew it

I mean I literally saw a plain white dog sell for about $30 ? That's not normal.

But otherwise I don't really care lol
Pumpkits Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Student Digital Artist
Iv been on here for 6 years ,I faced many hardships on here ,but this site is shit, cause no matter how much effort I put into my art ,no one buys "why?" I honestly do not know
I'm confident in my art , but every time I did a commission I found out people saying my art is rushed and half assed :/
This is a reason I stopped commission a lot ,
So I tried adopts and I'm told" you price your adopts to high"
Well in sorry 100 points is to much for you:/
Fuck points

Although I admit I do get angry when people who've been on for not even a year get more buyers or commission them me and become super popular , and they have "ok art" like I'm not a fan of it but what ever
I don't bash them . I just get very jealous

I do rely on my art as a income though
And make $0 a month on my adopts WOW (I Live on a trust fund ) ;3 it's just people on her are shit to me , and recently iv became salty

Honestly want to leave this god awful website and quit drawing

I draw for fun , not for money,
But getting money for my drawing and having fun with it would be nice:/
d3dx3 Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
i read all of the journal...ive been watching you for a while so i have read other journals of yours talking about your situation but i never realized the extent of it and your past. i have a lot of respect for you and admire how you have been through so much crap but still manage to work really hard and be a kind and generous and artists like you, who need the money to survive or help family, DESERVE to price things how you want. youre an inspiration to me as an artist and as a person, it makes me glad you are able to earn a good amount of money on here!
Carnivroar Featured By Owner Edited Aug 8, 2016  Student Digital Artist
holy shit fucking preach

people complain about the price of people's commissions and adopts so much but for a lot of us it's the only way to earn money for food, bills, rent, etc. 

it's not just a hobby. It's our job. We're just trying to survive.

smh so many disgusting people on this site. it's horrible you had to go through all that
Varmine Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Holyshit. As someone who has seen what you are talking about as unfair (despite the fact that I don't even really have the money to buy designs myself) I felt obligated to read all of this and I honestly think it's the first time I actually get it. I remember seeing you on scribble thinking "what a brilliant style", watching you on here, reading all the stuff you have gone through, and I always thought you must be one of the bravest people I know on here (I mean that). But I never really put it together and I feel sorta shit about that. I know what it's like to struggle with money even though I have never been homeless or without, and I want to say I'm sorry for all that happened and I'm sorry people don't understand. I think I'll never act like a dumbass about stuff like this again.
swintah Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
This is gold. You've been through so much and you're still here. You work so hard for a reason, and that haves a price but people dont understand.
This was needed to be said way too much?? I'm VERY happy you finally said it. I'm so proud of you and what you've become, and honestly you shouldn't feel bad about yourself.
No way, you're literally AWESOME. Everything about you is awesome and honestly you're a hella big inspiration to me in every existing way. Thank you a ton.
You're great and im very, very, very proud of you. Thank you a ton for saying this, being a huge inspiration to me, and existing.
Thank you a ton.
XanderGirl96 Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016
dang son. 
nograves Featured By Owner Edited Aug 8, 2016
preach it ^
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Submitted on
August 8, 2016


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